Best man duties

I think all went well this morning in getting Paul ready for his big day. The condemned man ate a solid, hearty breakfast and arrived at the church sober and on time. My one disappointment would have to be failing to arrange his last request as a single man - due to strong protests from the do-gooders at the Sheep Welfare Council.

My role as Paul's best man is going better than expected today. I've so far managed to get him to the church on time, and that's unusual for Paul - both going to church and being punctual. He also arrived sober, an achievement which shouldn't be underestimated. And whilst a bit of the polish may now have faded, at 3pm this afternoon he was also looking very smart - and that's totally unheard of.