College friend
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As we gather to honor the marriage of Paul and Linda, I look out over a sea of familiar faces. Many I recognize from the years Paul and I attended UCLA. Their presence here speaks volumes about the kind of people Paul and Linda are. When your college friends travel thousands of miles to be with you on the most important day of your life, it can only mean one thing: they heard about the free beer.
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For those of you who don’t know me, I am the groom's friend from college. Ever since he told me I had to do a speech, I have been trying to get myself out of it. But little does he know I am about to give him a character assassination! And it will be even more fun now because Linda's already married him and it’s too late for her to back out.