Humorous wedding observations

The first thing you feel when you’re asked to be best man is shock. Then disbelief. Then anger. Then denial. Then acceptance. Then dread. Now, finally, here I am in the seventh stage, dying a death.

You may think that being asked to be someone's Best Man is a sign of their love and respect for you. But that couldn't be further than the truth. The only reason Eric chose me is because he knows I'll have to ask him to do the same at my wedding. And he knows I can't tell a joke nor do I have any dirt on him. Eric, on the other hand, has a sharp tongue and a laundry list of my crimes retained in his memory. This isn't an honour; it's a trap.

Oliver actually has three best men; John organised the stag do, Gary chose the suits, and I was asked to deliver the speech. Is this because I am the best at public speaking? No, it's because I have the worst taste in clothes and I'm a boring old sod. Well, that's what he told me this morning anyway. Thanks for the pep talk buddy!