Revealing a funny groom trait

Oscar Wilde once quipped that true friends stab you in the front, and that’s something I would happily have done today. Unfortunately, it seems Paul has led a life of such purity and magnanimity, that he’s left me with little more than a metaphorical feather to attack him with. And he’s not even ticklish.

If you're writing a speech about someone you'd typically include a rundown of their goals, their achievements and their daily activities. That's not possible with Paul, not unless you want to hear 30 minutes of anecdotes about Xbox, X-Files and X-rated google searches.

Writing a best man speech about your best friend is easy; it's basically a list of all the insults I've thrown Jack's way over the years, and he's heard all those. It'd be much trickier if Kelly was doing this; Jack's got no idea what she's been saying behind his back.